All too often we seem to feel that whoever seems to shout the loudest is the one who will be heard. Yet influence on others is not simply about shouting or screaming, in fact sometimes doing that can backfire.
Instead one of the ultimate ways to influence a child, students and others, is by being an example and good role model. Ultimately, it is not about so much about what we say, it is much more about what we do.
It is this message that is the opening message of the Torah portion this week, in which the Kohen's are instructed to educate their children with the specific commandments that Kohens need to be mindful of.
Rashi, the great medieval commentator states that the word "Emor" (say), is repeated twice in the verse to teach us that the elders are warned about the younger ones. In other words, it is incumbent upon them, not just to do what is right themselves, but also to educate and teach their children about these values.
The Lubavitcher Rebbe pointed out several ideas about this verse and commentary, including the idea, that the word used here "LeHazhir" "to warn", is etymologically connected to the "to Shine". Meaning, for the parents to have the best influence on their children, it is less about warnings and discipline (although there is a need for a balanced approach to this too), and it is more about being "shining" role models, for what is right and good.
We were all once upon a time young children, and we can all probably point to, the values that were lived by our parents and teachers, as being the ones that most influenced us.
So to be an influencer, screaming, shouting and threatening may be instinctive and the default reactive mode, yet being a positive and shining sincere role model is probably the most powerful way to make a difference and inspire someone else.
It was those people who shined who inspired us, and it is us who must shine to inspire the next generation
Good luck in shining brighter!
Shabbat Shalom & Good Shabbos
Yisroel